Superior Ranch Taqueria = Superior Wet Burrito

This review, the very first review on Ludwig's Congress, goes out to my friend Sumo Bean, a PhD wielding smarty-smart smart who appreciates good meat.

Superior Ranch Taqueria is a little store/market that looks a little lopsided from the exterior (it seems to lean to the left). It is located withing walking distance from the Staples Center on the other side of the 110 freeway, next to Shamrock parking. It is a new establishment - it recently replaced it's wall hinged television bowl with a flat panel television that constantly plays soccer games or soap operas in Spanish. There is a nice cook named Peter and another cook who smiles a lot, whom I can only communicate with by pointing at the paper menu: Wet Burrito, "Carne Asaaaada", and five tacos + drink, "Carne Asaaada, no onions, girlfriend not like onions..."

The food? Absolutely orgasmically amazing, in my humble opinion.

For $5.50, the wet burrito - an onslaught of carne asada (or meat of your choice), rice, beans, and tortilla, smothered in salsa, onions, sliced tomatoes, avocado, and occasionally (depending on the chef) guacamole. It is a gargantuan burrito swimming in soupy sauce (which the chefs seem to add more with my every visit). Holistically it is perfect, transcendent, and - like all great culinary masterpieces - adaptive. What do I mean by adaptive? I mean that it changes its taste and its fun factor depending on where you are on your journey to burritos-end. Your first bite: piping hot, juicy, bite sized. Your fourth bite: the tortilla has opened up, the levies broken, and out has fallen the ingredients, swimming in salsa, red sauce, and melted gooey cheese, its composition altering like molecules realigning themselves into complex proteins. Your last bite: you are fishing for meaty goodies in the soup, stuffed to your britches, quite full but very stubborn in getting to the end. Sumo Bean, this is a very good burrito. I love it, girlfriend likes it, Ludwig Dog demands it.

The tacos. Five tacos and a drink for $5.00. Succulent tacos that need no salsa. The meat is drenched in its own juices. This is Girlfriend's preferred choice. It is quite good. Although I love onions, I must admit, the lack of onions that Girlfriend prefers really brings out the meat juices. My arteries love me.

Notes on the food: if you take the food to go, please be aware that the sauce in the wet burrito tends to spill over, as the container is filled to the brim already. In fact, the insides of the take-out bag was already awash in red sauce when my meal package was handed to me - how awesome is that? I understand you might not want to inconvenience yourself with the mess, but barring a Laker game attendance down the street, prohibiting yourself from enjoying this meal because you are afraid of a little back splash is a coward's decision. And a coward does not deserve this wet burrito.

Speaking about Laker games, it is my hope that this restaurant/market sees more business from attendees of L.A. Live. I recommend dining here before your Clipper or Kings games or show starts (Laker games, again, are exempt because one must be dressed at one's best for the church of Pau Gasol and company) - Superior Ranch Taqueria is only open from 8am to 9pm.

I haven't actually dined at Superior Ranch Taqueria myself - I always get it to go - but the ambiance is engaging. This is a mom and pop store. There are uniform tables and chairs scattered throughout. The walls are pastel like - brown and oranges (who the heck knows, I'm color blind). Across from the service line is a painting of a buff Aztec warrior holding a super-model-like female in his arms. Very interesting. Having grown up in a liquor store, I appreciate this place. I appreciate watching the evolution of this up-start establishment. From the upgrade in television to the slowly filling stocks of canned meats in the market shelves, this place is exciting in the way sim-city is. There is progression to this place. Looking at the coffee table with the non-bulk type coffee maker, one can imagine one's self putting this place together as the funds become available. The next visit, you see the handwritten menu replaced by printed menus. Styrofoam cups of different sizes with S, M, and L pop up to assist you in your decision making. There is much going on in this place, located in the orange-ish left leaning building at 1320 West 11th Street, Los Angeles CA, 90015.

In summary, you don't need to be a PhD or be a smarty-smart smart to enjoy this establishment's wet burrito and tacos. (do you like how I tied the whole review back to the beginning? I learned that sign-off from the local news! Shows that I'm a smarty smart smart too!)

p.s.: I took a picture of the monster burrito in 12 Megapixel glory. Can't upload it for the life of me. This is a shame, but anything less than 12 megapixels for this wet burrito is insufficient.